The Big C

A journey through Stage Four Cancer

Sunshine and Lollipops

on December 29, 2010

I’ve been debating with myself on what kind of posts do I want to do.  The whole purpose I began to write this blog, was so that other people diagnosed with stage four cancer might find a place of hope on the internet, in between all the depressing statistics that are stage four cancer.

I don’t want my blog to be depressing, but on the other hand, I don’t want my blog to be so sunshine and gumdrops happy, that it is really out of touch, and useless to people who aren’t feeling optimistic.

Because the truth of the matter is, stage four cancer is a monster.  It is a psychopathic stalker that you always have to keep your eyes open to.

What to do? What to do?


6 responses to “Sunshine and Lollipops

  1. lily says:

    Write what is in your heart. If you are feeling sugary sweetness, write it. If you are feeling gloom and doom, write about battling it. If you are feeling fear, write about how to cope with it. Life is a roller coaster ride, life with cancer is like cliff diving: Extreme lows, feeling a loss of control, then exhilaration and joy when you survive the fall. Or something like that. So, if your blog reflects extremes in emotion, that is realistic. You will touch hearts no matter what you do, Sweet Mary. That is who you are!

  2. Have Myelin? says:

    I say be honest. My blog isn’t all sweet and lightness. I lost my daughter and she was 34 years old. Grief is a bitch. I can’t be sugary sweet.

    Your situation is different than mine but it deserves your raw honesty.

    At least I think so.

  3. The Big C says:

    Thank-you Sherri and Lily for your input. When I started this blog, I wanted there to be another choice for those with my diagnosis as they search the web. The Cancer Society webpage is informative, honest and not very personal. It is also extremely depressing, if you are stage four.

    “This is your chance to take the vacation, may-be with your family, of a lifetime.”

    Fat chance! There is no Make A Wish foundation for grown ups. No one in Stage Four Cancer has more money than they did before diagnosis. They’re lucky if they have the same. Most will have significantly less money. In fact, I’m going to bet, the majority have waaay less money than before diagnosis.

    On the other hand, if you’re already depressed because of Stage Four Cancer, do you need anymore depressing sites?

    But this is also a blog written by a real person, not a PR Firm.

    So, I think I am going for real, and honest.

  4. Lori says:

    There’s something about finding comfort when you find out you are not alone. Sharing stories and concerns and hopes and dreams can be empowering. When you tell it and share it from your heart it makes it real. I give you so much credit and have so much admiration for you in your willingness to let others know they are not alone and by creating a place for others to come and read and share. I wish for you an amazingly wonderful 2011!

  5. I’m not a great one to offer advice here, Mary, because sometimes I feel trapped in my “humorous” blog, but when I need to I write seriously too. I had a brain tumor 9 years ago and, when it’s the right time, I’ve written about it. I wrote about my mother’s Alzheimer’s. I think that your blog isn’t exactly to duplicate information out there about stage 4, but to talk about your own personal journey. I think the thing you do where you give links to informative websites is great, but I like to read about you. I know from living through the tumor that not every day is about it. Keying into what I want the rest of my life to look like, no matter how much time that consists of, has been the real work I’ve done.

  6. The Big C says:

    Thank-you Lori and Linda, I think you are right. Stage Four, “warts” and all.

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